I Will Not be Silent For Long – A Poem

Last year a student group hosted at Duke Divinity School a brown bag discussion on the topic of LGBT inclusion in the Church.   The panel included three local openly gay (1) and lesbian (2) pastors of “welcoming and affirming” congregations.  Others included two heterosexual professors who were affirming of same-sex unions and one heterosexual female elder who pastors a “reconciling” UMC parish, a congregation which belongs to a grassroots movement within the United Methodist Church which advocates on behalf of LGBT Christians. There were no traditionalists represented on the panel.

I was deeply frustrated two nights before because I knew it was going to be a very slighted discussion.    I was even more frustrated because there were other voices left out of this conversation, namely same-sex attracted Christians who believe that homosexual practice is sinful in all contexts.  Because of their convictions, they remain celibate (although some do marry persons of the opposite sex).   Out of my frustration came this poem.    I post it here for your viewing. I dedicate this poem to Wesley Hill, Ron Belgau,  and all others who have the courage to walk the journey of celibacy as gay Christians.  Their voices need to be heard.

Where is my voice?

Hiding,

snuffed out by two dominant voices,

One – conservative, conserving, demanding truth, proclaiming “orthodoxy,

protecting – the sanctity of marriage – one man, one woman,

life-long commitment,

“That what the Bible says….Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve!”

The Other – progressive – calling for change, inclusion,

“God love us too! She made us this way…It’s not a sin to love!”

“Love = Love….that’s what Jesus would say…God is still speaking!”

Two voices – fighting, raging!

“Whose side are you on!!!”

Conservatives – “biblical truth or rebellion?”

Progressives – “radical inclusion or oppression?”

Where is my voice?

Snuffed out – at times

by the cold, cruel blade…

“Whose side are you on!!!”

A voice no one dares to hear…

Conservatives – “It’s an oxymoron to be gay and Christian…choose!”

Progressives – “How can you live in such a place of loneliness? Aren’t you just repressing your feelings? Self-hatred kills!”

Where is my voice?

small, yet emerging

trembling, with a whisper

longing to speak,

daring to speak,

waiting to speak,

from a place…

of peace and not despair,

of love and not fear,

of assurance and not doubt,

from faith….

Where is my voice?

It waits for the Power

from on High,

It desires to speak that which it has heard,

“the Word became flesh….”

My voice waits

for the Spirit,

who gives life and peace.

I will not be silent for long.

Until then,

I will be still,

and wait,

and listen,

and pray,

so,

at the appointed time

I will speak

of the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

I will speak

of His marvelous works – within me.

I will speak

of His loving-kindness and tender mercies.

I will not be silent for long.

Until then,

my voice waits within its chambers,

trembling…longing…waiting…yet resting…

I will not be silent for long.

Mary’s Baby: A Christmas Meditation

And [Mary] shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins. Now all this was done that it might be fulfilled which was spoken of the Lord by  the prophet, saying, Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us. 

Matthew 1:21-23 KJV; cf. Luke 1:26-38

Anyone growing up within African American Christian traditions will often hear one of the various titles of Jesus Christ often used in worship is “Mary’s Baby” or “Mary’s Little Baby.”  The old saints simply do not restrict its use only during Advent, Christmas, or Epiphany.  It’s used virtually all the time.  To some, this use of this title may seem either sentimentalist or (perhaps) theologically uncouth, since the Lord grew to adulthood.  However, the saints within the African American Church use this title in a robust liturgical and profoundly theological sense.

When the saints praise Jesus and call him “Mary’s Baby” they declare their faith in this Jesus, the One born to the Virgin. As attested in the Apostles’ Creed, they “believe in Jesus Christ, [God's] only Son, our Lord; [who] was conceived by the Holy Spirit and born of the Virgin Mary.   Jesus as “Mary’s Baby” has three theological affirmations wrapped into it. First, in acknowledging Jesus as the “Mary’s Baby,” African American Christians acknowledge Jesus as the incarnate Son.  We acknowledge God’s divine plan of redemption by sending the Son into the world to be God with us, Emmanuel.  For us and our salvation, the Son became human and was born to a young woman named Mary of Nazareth.  Secondly, we acknowledge the place of Mary within the salvation history.  According to God’s eternal and unsearchable wisdom, God selected this young woman to bear the Savior into the world.  Mary willingly yielded your life to the word given by the angel of the Lord and placed herself in harm’s way to bear the Christ knowing the costs to her reputation and her life.  Thirdly, we acknowledge the person and work of the Holy Spirit in the preparation of the body of the Son within the Virgin’s womb.  The Spirit, the Lord and life-Giver, mysteriously crafted the body of the Son without the agency of human sperm.  “For with God,” says Gabriel, “nothing shall be impossible” (Luke 1:37).

To worship the Lord as “Mary’s Baby” is to celebrate the coming of the Lord to save the world from sin and destruction.   To worship the Jesus as “Mary’s Baby” is to acknowledge this Jesus will return to consummate the divine plan of redemption.  This Christmas, let us all give praise the Father for sending the Son into the world by the power of the Spirit.  We celebrate Jesus, the King born in a manger.  We celebrate Jesus, the Savior born a defenseless babe.  We celebrate Jesus, the eternal Son of the Father, Mary’s Baby.    Thanks be to God.

tonight, the Eve of the Celebration of our Lord’s Birth, I cannot help but adore the Lord as “Mary’s Baby.”

So You’re a Minister, Right?

During this summer I served as a ministerial intern at an amazing church. One Wednesday evening, I facilitated a Bible study with a portion of the seven-hundred member congregation.  After the benediction Lacey* and Lisa*, two members with whom I had become acquainted decided to go to a local seafood restaurant to have some late night vittles.  They told me about a Wednesday night’s special: a spicy shrimp dish. As we arrived at the restaurant, we ran into one of Lisa’s girlfriends.  Brenda*, was a local art gallery owner.  Lisa introduced me as the intern at the church. Then Brenda looked at me and said, “So, you’re a minister? So what do you think…..?” Then the fun began!

Brenda went on to tell me how she was raised in the black Baptist tradition, then later renounced Christian faith but remained a theist.  She raised her kids without any religion. She asked me what I thought about portions of Christian worship which seemed to exclude non-Christians. She also wanted to know what I thought about her Christian friends calling her saying that they’ll pray for her atheist college-aged son who now apparently is exploring an Eastern religion.  Within five minutes, I was a bit annoyed and hungry. As this woman pouring her heart out and seeking my informed opinion, my mind was on that spicy shrimp dish!

“So you’re minister, right?” “So you attend divinity school, right?” “So, what do you think about….?”  Some say ministry doesn’t stop when you remove the collar, take off the robe, step down from the pulpit, and walk out of the sanctuary. But sometimes, well, many times I think, “Damn, ordained and licensed clergy have to live their lives too!”   I want to be normal some times.  Don’t get me wrong! I’m called to representative ministry.  What I mean is that I would like to enjoy a good movie without thinking of its theological implications.  I want to go out to eat and have a good time without someone starting a statement: “So, you’re a minister, right? What do you think about….?”  Whenever people learn of my vocation, they begin to ask me questions or act different around me, unless their seminarians and ministers too then we can all have beers in bliss! Perhaps some people are genuinely sincere about what I think regarding issues concerning faith and life. Otherwise, I assume people want to create an interesting conversation or start some unnecessary s*@t.

Often when I come home from a long day of study or class at Duke, I get calls from my brother late evenings asking me deep theological questions.  ”My God, can a brother get some sleep?!!”  I’ve become his theological go-to guy.  I can count it a privilege, but I often consider it annoying.  ”Hasn’t he heard of Wikipedia or Crosswalk?  Amazon and Christian Book Distribution have specials on books regarding that subject?” I want to tell him,  ”Get off the phone and call me at a more godly hour!”

I am a minister. Every day I am learning more of what this means. The call to proclaim the Gospel through word and sacrament is humbling. To witness the passing of some one’s grandfather, to visit the sick and shut-in, to serve Communion to the forgiven, and to preach the Gospel is nothing short of incredible.  However, I often experience joy going to my favorite bookstore, chillin’ out at my favorite coffee shop, or lingering at my favorite kitchen appliance store without “outing” myself as clergy.

Some way or another, the Spirit brings in my life those who may never step foot in a church building to hear what I have to say or want me to have a listening ear and practice the ministry of presence.   “So, you’re a minister, right?” “Yes, I am.” “Can I ask you about…?” Here it goes again.  God be praised!

 

*pseudonyms to protect anonymity

A Reflection on Sermon Writing

I have completed writing a sermon that I will deliver this Sunday at my internship. It took a period of two and half days to finish the message. I spent all day revising. My preaching colleague and classmate provided an extra set of eyes of revision and critique since she won’t be able to hear me deliver it on Sunday.

I find the sermon writing process a bit stressful at times.   Over two weeks ago I was struggling to find a text  to preach. I simply had no idea what to preach.  I prayed. And prayed. Waited, then prayed some more.  I pulled out the Revised Common Lectionary to see if it had any ideas.  The Old Testament reading was Genesis 22, The Binding of Isaac.  I thought, “Oh no, I’m not preaching that!”   So I prayed. And prayed some more.  Then I waited.    Dry for several days.

Then one day last week, I had a impression of two texts on which I preached last year for my trial sermon.    I pulled that sermon up.  But I wasn’t going to preach this sermon in this context.  I needed something fresh of the press!  First I read the texts again.  Then I felt like God was giving me a new message to preach from these texts.  So I wrote down some impressions on slips of paper.  I’d but the Book down and walk away. When talking with folk, I received “downloads” then pull out a notepad and jot things down.    The insights from the analysis yielded similar results to last  years’.  Then I found some new gems in the text.  Cool!  Then off to do exegesis.  Plowed to my handy one-volume commentary, my bible dictionary, compared translations and what not.   Turned on my computer, pulled up a blank document, and was totally blank.   “Lord, how and the world am I going to started this thing?”

The process of sermon writing is a daunting, thrilling, and humbling experience.  It’s daunting because preachers serve the Word, and dare speak the Word of God!  Preachers do not presume to speak for God, but are commanded to speak for God.   We are authorized to declare the Good News.     It takes patience and obedience. The Word is near us, yet it cannot be controlled.  Karl Barth wrote that when preachers engage the Bible, we enter into  a “strange new world.”  A world which does not have to justify itself before magistrates of modernity or the potentates of post-modernism.  We look and we see in its pages the witness to God’s good future. We also see the witness of our deepest human failures.  The Word discerns us, reads us better than we can ever read the Book.  Preachers proclaim the Book proclaim the One whom the Book attests, the Word made flesh.

It’s a thrilling!  You have to have  a sense of imagination.  The Scriptures engage all of our senses.  I’m riding the Spirit through the Great Forest of Scripture. I see the trees of Genesis down through the Revelation of John. We stand before the great tree of Jeremiah. The Spirit takes me up in her wings and we fly up to see all the mighty branches. Of them is the dreadful branch of Chapter 23.   On it is where we perched so that I may analyze the text for the message.

It’s a humbling experience.  I find that this branch is powerful, strong enough to hold me.  I see leaves of judgment and restoration. More judgment than restoration I might say.   I don’t know were to start.  Then the Spirit points her beak to a particular bundle of leaves. There I turn my face and walk in that direction.    I don’t know what I should do.  I turn to the Spirit and ask, “God, what should I say?” Then the Spirit opens her beak and a twig from the great Tree of John’s Gospel.   It was from Chapter 10.   So I put the two branches together and I understood the message.

Now I have  a new message to deliver.  It’s entitled “A Shepherd We Can Count On.” It draws from Jer. 23:1-8 and Jn 10:7-15.   I covet your prayers so that I may be found worthy to preach the Gospel!

God Our Hiding Place: A Meditation

Scripture gives us powerful images of God. One of them is a hiding place. Psalm 91 opens up with these words: “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.  I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress.” (NIV)  Throughout this psalm, the Psalmist speaks of God as refuge, shelter, fortress, and dwelling place.   These images depict places of protection from dangerous enemies, diseases, and rest from fear and toil.  God guards his beloved from wild beasts and dispatches angels around her.  God does this because God love his beloved.  Moreover, God promises to be with his beloved in trouble.  God’s very presence is the beloved’s deliverance.   These images reminds me of God’s covenant promise of abiding with humanity.  As God’s elect people, Israel experienced God’s abiding presence through the reception  of the Law at Sinai, their worship at the Temple.   In fullness of time,  the Father sends to Word into the world to abide with us in human flesh.    Ten days after the Lord’s Ascension, the holy Spirit of promise comes like a rushing mighty wind to abide and give birth to the Church.

In the New Testament, we come to a deeper understanding of this truth.  The resurrected Lord brings us into the very life of the triune God.   Paul speaks to the church at Colosse, regarding their new life with Christ: “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory” (Col 3:1-4).    Our lives are “hidden” in God.  In this reality, the human creature is renewed in the knowledge of her Maker and Lord.

This hiding of our lives must not be confusing with escapism or obscurantism.   God as refuge does not mean that humans do not face the realities of being human in the world.  What it means is that as hiding place God is the source of strength by which we acknowledge the trouble we face, the power to go through it, and the one who brings us through it.    God is the final Word over all calamity and manner of devastation.   God is our Life.

God’s life renews our life which was dead through trespasses.   Because of God in Christ, we are now dead to sin, not because of it.    In God, our lives are transformed to live in the world according to God’s way.  The old ways of living prove worthy of God’s wrath.  Now we live unto God. As God’s chosen people, Paul says, we taken upon godly virtues which bind us together in unity (Col. 3:12-14).  We are forgiven, therefore we forgive. We love, because God first loved us.   We reconcile with our brothers and sisters, because in Christ God reconciled the world to himself.   God as our hiding place is God’s way of showing us that God is for us.  Therefore, we are for doing God’s will and walking in peace and love towards God, each other, and those who desperately needing good news.

 

 

My Father’s House: A Meditation on John 14:1-3

I am sitting at my dining area table. I should be reading for a paper but I can’t stop thinking about a theme recurring within my head: “My Father’s House.” In the fourteenth chapter of John’s Gospel, Jesus continues to speak with his disciples before he is arrested, tried, tortured, crucified and buried.  Jesus tells his disciples that he is going to prepare a place for them in his Father’s house.  Who is this Father Jesus speaks of? Jesus’ Father, Abba, is the Holy One of Israel, YHWH, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He is the One who delivered Israel from the bondage in Egypt and made a covenant with Israel at Mt. Horeb (Sinai). Jesus’ Father is the One chose Moses, a Hebrew fugitive who was once an adopted royal in the house of Pharaoh, as his prophet and appointed Aaron and his sons as his priesthoods in the Tent of Meeting. Jesus’ Father is the One who sent Jesus into the world not to condemn it, but to save it.

Jesus implored his disciples to recognize that his Father as their Father, the One who covenants with Israel anew, reforming it and opening its borders to those who were afar off, as the apostle Paul speaks of the Gentiles. Jesus goes to prepare for his disciples a place within the Father’s house. In order to accomplish this Jesus must enter through the valley of death by giving his life at Golgotha. It was on a hill which the Prince of Glory commends his spirit to the eternal Father. Jesus was buried in a rich man’s tomb. On the third day, the Father, by the might of the Spirit, raised Jesus from the dead. Now Jesus sits at the Father’s right hand. Jesus has prepared a place for them and for those who believe.

Jesus tells us in John 14 that in our Father’s house there are many dwelling places (“mansions” for those KJV lovers). This place in my Father’s house is a place where the Father has welcomed me into his loving care through the gift of his Son and his Holy Spirit. The place is beyond spatial. This place is within God’s good future – when God reconciles all things back to himself through the work of the perfecting Spirit.  The Spirit renews, recreates, and perfects all things according to the will of the Father.  This good future, as the Revelator envisions, is the new heaven and the new earth.  In my Father’s house, peace and love abides lavishly and eternally. Sin and sorrow have no place in my Father’s house. God dwells with humanity and all of God’s creation.

As children of the kingdom, we experience a glimpse of this glory through the gift of the Spirit within the heart of the believer. We also see a glimpse of this perfection through what God is doing in the earth. The Spirit continues to brood over the earth, sustaining it despite all the environmental changes which humans have induced much to our misfortune. We also see this glimpse of glory work out through the ministry of reconciliation which God has commissioned the Church to do. I say this with trepidation because the Church has not always obeyed Christ’s command to preserve the earth. Nevertheless, Christ continues to minister to and through broken vessels by the strength of the Spirit.

In my Father’s house love, peace, and joy abides. Sweet living water flows from the throne of the eternal Father. Come go with me to my Father’s house. Experience the grace, mercy, and love of the blessed triune God – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  Jesus has prepared a place for those who love him and who earnestly repent of their sin. Will you come?

The Gospel and the Preacher

One of the most insightful lessons for understanding the Holy Scriptures comes from my pastor and homiletics professor William C. Turner, Jr.  Turner argues in lecture on “The Gospel and the Preacher,” Turner gives students some insight the task of preaching call of the preacher.  Here are some nuggets from our first lecture:

1. Christian preaching is charismatic in that it is the gift of the Spirit to the preacher for the preacher and the whole body of Christ.  It is a grace (charis).  Christian preaching is a trinitarian work: the preacher is commissioned by the Son for the glory of God the Father through the power of the Spirit. Preaching is words accompanied by the very Breath of God.  Human words, frail as they are, are inspired by the Spirit to proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ to the Church and the world. Therefore, Christian preaching’s central subject is the triune God at the heart of the gospel.

2.  Moreover, the preacher is positioned between God and the people. The preacher is from among the people and she is an instrument of God.  The preacher participates in the mission of God (missio dei) and the life of the people whom God addresses. Preaching is not merely a solo act, however.  The people of God have a deep spiritual investment in the preacher, the spokesperson of God.

3. Christian preaching is biblical preaching.  The Christian preacher stands within a company of witnesses which preceded her in their call to proclaim the glad tidings of God.  The Holy Scriptures are a collection of the testimonies of the faithful. The Spirit spoke by the prophets; God in these latter days speaks by his Son; the Son speaks through his apostles.  The preacher stands within and under the authority of God through glad submission to the revelation of God in Christ as attested by the Spirit-inspired Scriptures.

A Prayer of Confession

Let us confess our sin to  God:

Most holy and merciful Father; we acknowledge and confess before thee our sinful nature – prone to evil and slothful in good – and all our shortcomings and offenses.  Thou alone knowest how often we have sinned in wandering from thy way, in wasting thy gifts, in forgetting thy love. But thou, O Lord, have mercy on us, who are ashamed and sorry for all wherein we have displeased thee.  Teach us to hate our errors, cleanse us from our secret faults, and forgive our sins for the sake of thy dear Son.  And O most holy and loving Father, help us, we beseech thee, to live in thy light and walk in thy ways, according to the commandments of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

- Henry van Dyke

As quoted in Hughes Oliphant Old, Leading in Prayer: A Workbook for Worship (Grand Rapids, MI: Wm. B. Eerdmans, 1995), 100.

New Year, New Start

Happy New Year,

I am going to start this new year actually taking some time to write and post my thoughts. I feel invigorated from the break and it’s time to really write my thoughts about what I am learning here at Duke Divinity School.  So expect posts on topics like the authority of Scripture, Christology, and theological anthropology. I didn’t forget about those review of Jenson’s Systematic Theology (2 vols.) and Marin’s Love is an Orientation. I’m going have to keep them aside. I will add some reflections from textbooks.

This spring semester will be interesting. I’m taking preaching, Christian Ethics, Worship in African American tradition, and Exegesis of the Epistle to the Galatians. Also, I’ll be assisting facilitation of a study on the book at church, The Holy Spirit: Growth in Biblical Tradition by George Montague.

This is going to be fun!

Speak

As the world bustles with wars

And with rumors of wars,

As cyberspace swells with straw man attacks,

As opinion editorials line peoples’ kitty litter boxes,

Speak.

 

As the blogosphere is solace to the cowardly,

As the television is the palace of thieves,

As the pulpits are citadels for robbers,

Speak.

 

As I sit wondering if a change gone come,

As I cry waiting for deliverance from despair,

As I pray with my fingers on my keyboard,

Speak.

 

Speak, O incarnate Word,

Into the depths of darkness,

Into the abyss of turmoil,

Into the halls of complacency,

Into the rooms of despots, wool-dressed wolves,

Into the chambers of pimps as prophets,

Speak.

Speak.

Speak,  for your servants are listening.

Speak.

Speak.

Speak, for only in you is the hope of glory.

Speak.

Speak.

Speak, for only in you we find eternal life.

Speak.

Speak.

Speak, for only you show us the Father.

Speak.

Speak.

Speak, for your Spirit gives and sustains life.

Speak.

Speak.

Speak.